Thoughts

Wow! its here again, another year is around the corner. I am quite excited about the prospects of a new year but at the same time am sad about the failures and mistakes of the old year. A lot of people might not have any regrets and a lot might have but I fall into the category of those with regrets and they are so many. I have made decisions that not only affected my life negatively but I have also dragged innocent people into the mud with me.

This decisions which I am just begining to acknowledge have led me to resent,hate and even envy. I used to blame everybody apart from myself for the problems that I face. I blamed my dad, my lecturers, my uncles and even sometimes my siblings. I never once looked at myself and think maybe its my fault. In the past I wrote some pieces that blamed my government for my short-comings but is it really there fault, yes I know that there are issues in this country not caused by one person. But lets look at it seriously and closely, I went to the university got a 2.2 is that somebodies fault. Afterall people in the same class as I got an upper, so what's my own excuse.

The reason why am writing this is not because am second guessing my own opinions, no. On the contrary am only looking at things from another perspective, that what if I had done it this way or that way would it have been different. But what's bringing up all this thoughts, its the end of the year. I have come to realise that as humans we wait for a remarkable time characterised by a special event in order to look back at our lives and weigh it. The good book says that on the day of judgement every good deed and every bad one would be weighed and passed through fire, and if it is not consumed by the fire then according to me you have lived a fulfilled life.

I have a thought to myself, can my deeds of the past year pass through the fire and remain unburnt.